I was on deadline with an interview to finish, so I couldn’t watch the game. When I saw the result, I realized that working on a Sunday morning was actually preferable to going to the pub.

Also, the interview was with Irvine Welsh, author of Trainspotting and so many other great other books, so that was kind of cool.

And, no, I didn’t ask him about Hibs and Hearts, because we were supposed to talk about his new book, The Sex Lives of Siamese Twins, although, now that I think of it, a soccer interview with Irvine Welsh would be a far better feature on this blog than an analysis of a 5-0 thrashing.

Actually, I don’t even know why I started this post, because, as I said just the other day, I’ve completely run out of ways to talk about not scoring.

I guess I could observe that Arsenal have scored more goals in their last four games (13) than Villa have scored all season (11). I could even add that there are four individuals in the Premier League with more goals than our team’s woeful total (Diego Costa, 17; Sergio Aguero, 14; Charlie Austin, 13; Alexis Sanchez, 12).

And we’re all aware that Villa have the worst goals-per-game ratio the 649 teams in the top 9 tiers of English soccer, and that they’re on track to set a Premier League record for the least goals scored in a season.

Now in 16th place, it feels like it will be a miracle if they avoid relegation.

As I said, I don’t know why I started this post. Check out the Welsh interview—it’s much better reading.